Waking Up In Canada

Time Out Just To See

April 2, 2012

Filed under: Inspiration,life — wakingupincanada @ 12:49 pm
Tags: , , ,

After a beautiful breakfast at Bruno’s, my friend left for work and I sat back to savour the last of my morning coffee. In the corner, a tv played golf with no volume. I don’t follow golf and my knowledge on it is purely what I have gleaned from polite conversational questions when sitting with those who have a strange passion for the slow walk around a beautiful park while hitting a ball in front of them.

Despite my limited knowledge, it seemed like a countdown of sorts; golf’s near misses or strange incidents. In one, a golfer putted the ball up a small steep slope just off the green, only to have it narrowly miss the summit and roll back down to him. In another, a fantastic shot brought the ball just to the tip of ground above the hole, and no further would it drop.

Why is it the closer we get to getting it perfect, the more painful it is to miss at the final second, final inch, final putt?

Nobody clapped these men on the back for almost making a hole in one, for almost putting a difficult shot, for almost winning it all. Obviously when they have their shots screened on television, they are not simply Sunday morning golfers but tops in their game.

When I went golfing, or rather to play pitch and putt, which I may add I hated, I danced up and down when a) I hit the ball b) it went in the direction of the hole and c) when it ended. Barr c), which may be considered unsportsman-like, the other 2 seem to me like perfectly legitimate reasons to celebrate. These were successes in my world of golf.

When you look at it, the bigger the stakes, the more damning it is to fail.  The better you are, the less forgivable it is for you to mess up. It makes me wonder, why do we even try?

How often when we really work at something, a great meal, a 5km run, yoga 4 times a week, bigger sales, we play down the effort and motivation behind it. We make out we aren’t really trying: “It’s just a few things I threw together”, “I usually just take it easy”, “I skip runs all the time”, “I’m still unfit”, “it was just luck”. We have every excuse ready to whittle away any evidence we are actually trying, trying to get better, be better, do better. We don’t want to try and fail, or rather, we don’t want to be seen trying and then failing.

It makes me appreciate those people who put themselves out there. I will run this marathon, I will lose this weight, I will get an A in this test. When you put yourself out there, when you show the world that you are working your ass off for something, you should be applauded from the get-go. These are the people who we need to get behind, to support and to motivate.

It never is easy. It is never easy to manage a team, a diet, an exercise regime, a new skill, a country. I am behind those who try. Not those who explain how well they can do it by making it sound easy but those who admit to all the challenges ahead and instead tell me how they will manage the obstacles, the slopes, their own weaknesses, and what they will do right after they miss the final shot by an inch. Because the person who can admit that they may fail, but will try anyway, that is the person I want to be behind.


NaNoWriMo October 31, 2011

Filed under: NaNoWriMo,Uncategorized — wakingupincanada @ 6:27 am
Tags: , , ,

To most, my title may look like a jumble of letters, which was what I thought a few weeks back. It is actually National Novel Writing Month, planned annually for November by The Office of Light and Letters. This is the kind of place I would love to work. Firstly, they work for an organisation that JK Rowling may have named. Secondly, their job is to use letters to light up people’s lives or, put a different their own way, to co-ordinate events to inspire people of all ages to write.

I came across this when I began the Post A Day Challenge. I nodded in appreciation and moved on. I then came across it in a magazine this week, and thought, why not? I am enjoying dipping my toe in the literary waters and immersing myself fully excites me to my very soul. I have signed up. I am full of energy since my decision to say yes, so I take that as a good indication I am doing the right thing. If I fail, if I cannot take the time and take my character on her long, long journey of 50,000 words, well, so what? Only my character will die. No harm will come to any individual or animal or plant.

This is the excitement phase. Writing begins tomorrow with the aim of 1667 words a day when I may enter overwhelmed phase. I am preparing: I am developing my own schedule, my own goals. I am getting to know my character within my mind, and taking her out for a first date already. I like most of her, but she does a few things that annoy me. She has a name and a hometown. The information on the NaNoWriMo website is first class, and I feel comforted by the huge volume of people also saying yes with positivity and courage. We are not to edit, we are to write, write, write!

Please do not worry that I am launching myself on the publishing world: Another aspiring writer dreaming of making it big. This is about indulging in my passion, my preferred drug. Last year I ran a marathon which is approximately 55,000 steps, depending on the runner. I ran it slowly, at my own pace, and my goal was to cross that finish line. This November, I am doing a similar project. It will be words not steps. It too will require commitment, faith and support. There may be times I wonder why I signed up but I know I will not even consider dropping out. I will be tired. Just like the marathon, the result is simply for me to be able to say,”I did it”. Perhaps come December 1st, I will click save and my Novel will sit in my folders never to be opened again. The thing is, there will be a Novel.

I was going to tell nobody about this. I am too excited to keep my mouth shut. Plus by putting it out there, by letting people know, I am tying myself in more, raising expectations, allowing people to support me to reach my goals.

So as I embark on this project, I ask for understanding from those around me, for being overly-excited, distant,  elated, tired, grumpy; the myriad of feelings that are coming. I will be back to normal on December 1st. Perhaps my normal will be a few notches higher.