It is Day 12 of the 30 Day Yoga Challenge.
I have committed to 6 classes a week for a month. I like my challenges: my fastest 5 miles, my Novel Writing Month and now, it is yoga’s turn for an intense period of dedication. My Mother would probably appreciate if I gave as much attention to my faith but in my defence, I do believe in living my faith through all my activities.
Now nearing the end of week 2, it is interesting to look at how far I have come. I am definitely stronger in my upward/downward dogs. I am managing a version of full wheel more often. I am balancing a little better in my half moons and reverse moons and aeroplanes. It is in my attitude that I am growing.
I arrived to my mat on Monday groggy and went through it. I felt stiff and boring and listless. I felt groggy still on Tuesday and then I remembered, I love this class. Tuesday evening Ashtanga is the start of my 2 days off. I smiled and moved and breathed. I love the instructo’s humour and hands on corrections. Wednesday was Flow and I went twice. It was a challenge in the crowded room, one fall over would have brought down at least another, and again I found myself digging deeper, softening my face and remembering my love. I loved this instructor’s wise words for contemplation in the midst of stretches adn balances. Thursday was Ashtanga and we were brought back to basics. It is amazing how little I know about the simple things and the wonderful opportunity to look at my foundations.
Why is it that when we commit to something we love we worry we will fail? As if the failure will bring with it punishment and condemnation. It rarely does you know, except from ourselves. Committing to something we love is saying yes to happiness, yes to enjoying the moment, agreeing to stick through the tough times even when it means putting our heads in the mat and just breathing in the energy to continue. Commitment means that at that moment, you show up. It does not mean that you are perfect, or that it will always be easy, or that things will work out the way they should like in a fairytale. Commitment is not something imposed but voluntarily given. You give because you love it, because the rewards, be they in emotional support, in health, in laughter or in love, outdo anything that you can give. My mat asks nothing more of me than to be on it, just as me.
I will be on my mat. I will be present and fully engaged. I may be stiff and tired but Iwill be me, at that moment. I will be grateful for the opportunity to practice what I love.